Painting With A Four-Year Old

Recently I have been trying to paint my basement. I have no idea why, but there I stood with a paint brush in my hand and great ambitions in my heart. Then it happened... My four year old asked if she could help me paint. With cute little eyes and a big smile on her face, she said, "Please Daddy, can I help you paint the basement?" I thought about the mess she would inevitably create. I thought about how my project would surely slow down. I thought about what brush she would use. I thought about all the time I would have to take to show her how do it right. I knew that this was going to be a mess and I thought about sending her back upstairs to play with Mom or one of my other three kids. (I still haven't found out if my wife sent her down to the basement.) I thought about why I couldn't have some time for myself and actually finish a project.

With an attitude in my voice, I told my little four year old to get some real old clothes on and let Mommy know. She grabbed the paint brush and started to paint just in front of where I was painting. She started by painting circles. She then started to paint pictures of our family. Then unicorns, ducks, dogs, etc.... You get the point. The entire time she was either telling me about her pictures or asking me questions.

The questions from a four year old can often leave you a bit confused.

Daddy:

"Why does the paint dry a different color?"
"How does paint stay on the wall?"
"What do they make the brush out of?"
"Did the unicorn lose her other horn?"
"Can we always paint together?"
"Does Mommy like to paint too?"
"Can I paint my bedroom pink?"
"Does God like to paint?"
"Can I have a drink?"
"Do hamsters smell paint?"
"Are we going to paint the whole basement?"
"Can we have a snack?"
"Did Jesus and God ever paint together?"
"Why do turtles live in a shell?"
"I love cookies and peanut butter."
"Can I go to the bathroom?"
"Do fish sleep?"
"How old were you when first painted?"
"Why do hamsters have to die?"
"Does God ever have nap time?"
"Are you older than Mommy"

On and on it went. She talked to me the entire time.

We painted together for at least two hours. To my surprise, we had a great time. I still tried to get a great deal done but I actually found myself looking forward to her next question or comment. She was so excited, energetic, and happy to help, that I found myself in awe of the of this little girl. She had no idea what she was getting into and neither did I. What turned out was a partially finished messy painted basement and a memory that I will never forget.

The lesson I learned is that I need to focus more on people instead of tasks. I know my basement will get finished some day. When? It doesn't matter. What matters is that my little girl and I had a great time and we learned so much from each other. I know some day the questions and comments will be far fewer and she won't need her Daddy in the same way. I know someday she probably would rather do about a million other things than help her Daddy paint the basement. I dread that day. But for now, I have a little four-year old who likes to help and still likes to talk to her Dad.

I pray that I can apply the patience I found with my four-year old, when I deal with other people. I pray that they can apply the pateince that my four-year old showed me when they deal with me.

Take the time and paint with a four-year old. You'll be glad you did.

Please write back and let me know if you have had similar expereinces.

That One Word

I have been thinking recently about what the students of Trinity Lutheran School will remember long after they have graduated. What will their thoughts be? How will they view their experiences at our school? Will they remember a certain teacher or friend from their class? What will be their most exciting memory? What about their worst?

School years make an incredible impression on our lives. I can remember clearly events from my childhood and experiences I had in school. Some good…Some not so good. I can remember certain teachers and even the words they said to me that had a profound impact on my life. Words and experiences that may have seemed unimportant at the time were permanently etched into my mind. When I think back to my experiences, I am reminded very clearly that I and the other people here at Trinity are making lasting memories for our students. What will those be?

I am reminded that seemingly innocent or off-hand comments can stay in the mind of a student for a long time even after the one who made the comment has forgotten what was said. The old saying that "sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can never hurt me" is not very true at all. Words often hurt far worse that any physical pain. We also tend to forget what the context was when the comment was made. I remember words of praise and encouragement and I also remember when teachers and principals spoke to me when angry or tired of my shenanigans. (Yes, I spent some time in the principal’s office.)

It seems to me that many of us remember a special teacher that had an impact on our lives. Many times teachers who are remembered the most are the ones who were firm but yet forgiving. They had challenging lessons and demanded much, but yet they were patient and understanding. They did not view teaching as just another job, they viewed teaching as a calling to serve and make a difference. I can remember many foolish things I did in school, but I remember even more the consequences I received and how I learned from my mistakes. (I learned not to bring a water gun on the last day of my 8th grade year the hard way)

What an awesome responsibility it is to work with young people. I pray that I make the right decisions and the words I choose do more good than harm. I pray that our students will have fond memories of their time here at Trinity. I pray that our students will look back and know that we taught them because God has called us to teach math, science, and other subjects, and most importantly, about Him.

Sometimes, that one word can make a world of difference.